If you haven't seen any of my other blogs, this is the last one which you can follow to the beginning: http://prettybaldonline.blogspot.co.uk/2015/08/screw-being-normal.html
Many apologies
for being absent for the last few months, I have been fairly busy with moving and starting
university. I have had a busy first semester.
Starting
university is a daunting thing; new place, new people and new things to do. So
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little nervous. But I am being honest in saying
that, alopecia was one of the last things on my mind. I am lucky in that
respect as I can imagine that some people, in a similar situation may be a little
more concerned about it.
I suddenly
realised that at a place like a university, there is much more diversity and
there’s such a wide variety of people from a range of backgrounds that seeing
someone with alopecia is not a big deal. Because usually, they would have
experienced it already.
I am by no means saying that people will not mention it
or it will not be noticed- but accepted, yes.
Of course
when you go ‘out-out’ people will try to touch your head-- if you don’t want
them to, do not let them- you deserve the same respect that they they want.
(Most guys I see on a night out look like they’d flip if you touched their
carefully crafted keratin). Of course drunk people will ask about it from time
to time but don’t let it upset you… Just because they don’t have manners/too drunk to care doesn’t
mean you don’t look bitchin’.
I truly do
feel that having alopecia has helped me become who I am today, who knows, I may
not even be at the university I wanted or not have been confident enough to make the
friends I have. And this would be a great shame, I really am happy how I am and
if offered the choice to undo my hair falling out, I wouldn’t go for it… It’s
not worth the risk because what I have now is not something I want to lose.
My key piece
of advice to anyone who has recently shaved their head, is to own it. This is far
easier said than done but what I mean by this is: embrace it, love it. People
respect you owning it- you may feel like you are playing
with a handicap but in all honesty (sorry for the major cliché) personality is still key.
If I am
honest with myself, I do enjoy receiving attention in general- it is not always a good thing but
it is definitely a personality trait of mine. Perhaps that is why I managed to
get on with my alopecia so quickly. Personally, I loved freshers’ week and
having no hair created the perfect blank canvas for dressing up. Each night I
sported a different coloured face paint eye brow, fake tattoos and world flags
spanning my scalp also featured. It was a nice way to really express who I am
and what I am about.
Although standing out wasn’t my intention I feel it is helpful
when coming somewhere new, as you are more easily recognised. Additionally, for
Halloween I capitalised on my ‘strength’ to become Bane from DC’s Batman. It
was something I had wanted to do since shaving my head and well it was a popular
costume when out- I think the realistic bald head made the costume seem
very real. And of course I very much enjoyed people enjoying the
costume.
Of course
me saying ‘own it’ and telling you what I have done will not make you get over your hair loss- that’s not what I am saying. I am not over my hair loss
entirely but what I am encouraging you to do is to make the best of what you
have. CLICHÉ WARNING- loving yourself is a big step towards others loving you.
I would
like to finish with my analogy:
A wall has
several coats of paint on it, to access the bare wall and actually see what it
truly looks like and what it's made of- the paint has to be sanded off. If we
replace the wall for ‘YOU’ and the paint for ‘HAIR’ and the sand paper for ‘ALOPECIA’,
you can see what I mean about it helping you to find yourself.
Keep
strong, you are all amazing- this is not an easy journey :)
Alopecia doesn't define you
