Pretty Bald: My first wig experience... A lesson in determination whatever the odds

Losing your hair can be terrifying particularly if like me you don't know the cause, trigger or likely outcomes and instead feel like you are wading through mud just trying to get through each day. Don't worry, that feeling does pass, but in the meantime many opt to select a wig in a bid to maintain a sense of normalcy and identity. That's perfectly natural and can help recreate a feeling of control, and if you're anything like me, that first wig will blossom into multiple ones, and potentially even a collection to rival the one in your shoe cupboard!

Despite my obvious enthusiasm for wigs, and my encouragement to look on the bright side of your hairloss (search #100HairFreeDays on the PrettyBald blog), it's not always been easy and my first experiences with wig shopping were a complete and utter nightmare. Before I get started telling you that story, it's probably best that you understand a little more about me - I am incredibly lazy in many ways, and growing up, that laziness stretched to the way I looked; when other teenagers became obsessed with rolling up their skirts and applying some then wonky lines of eyeliner, I could always be counted on to appear with my skirt the right length and my face make-up free, regardless of whether my spots had flared up or not. Writing it like that, I sound horrifying and a little like the class freak; but in reality for me, I simply couldn't be bothered to get up earlier to put make-up on, when an extra half an hour in bed seemed just the ticket! Even to this day I treat make-up as a luxury; something I wear for important meetings or nights out, but not as part of my daily routine - I just don't care enough what others think of me and don't need make-up to give me confidence personally.

Switch back then to the beginning of my hairloss journey; my hairloss was fairly slow and I was officially diagnosed by the Dermatologist as having Alopecia Areata. I initially underwent steroid injections into the scalp, but despite stimulation of small patches of soft, downy hair, regrowth was restricted to the injection site and the hairloss elsewhere didn't slow even marginally. The Dermatologist suggested we didn't persevere with the treatment and that in all likelihood I could expect progression to Alopecia Totalis. He wasn't wrong, but at the time that situation seemed hopeless and so I did my research and toddled off to visit a Trichologist (I can confirm not Mark Blake who wasn't a Trichologist at the time, but another local to me); I walked in and she must have cottoned on that the untreatable nature of alopecia can make sufferers desperate to try something, anything to stem the loss. I was no different and aside from starting the session with "Your hairloss is progressing and there's no sign of the follicles, so you'll lose it all", which nearly made me vomit in fear, she then progressed to talking wigs (which I "wasn't ready for yet") at the same time plying me with some expensive Forever Living Aloe Vera Juice, some specialist concealing make-up and a bottle of Minoxodil. I left that clinic hundreds of pounds worse off, and despite religiously applying Minoxodil and drinking bucketloads of Aloe Vera for two months it did absolutely nothing and I was left with a bitter taste in my mouth about this 'specialist'. I decided then I wasn't going back to her for wig advice and to this day I'm glad I didn't - I think the lack of empathy would have killed me and her commitment to high commission would have bled me dry too.

From there I was at a loss where to go, but speaking to people I knew in the area, a number of people mentioned a male wig specialist who seemed to be the only one in Cheltenham. His mainstay day-to-day work was hair extensions including many of the ladies who work in Stringfellows, but he also offered a wig consultancy service to help and support those with hairloss. He seemed really positive and seemed to know his stuff, and most importantly his focus was on me, my hairloss and how I felt, not on the commission he could gain from me. We talked through a number of options, from a full wig (synthetic or human) to a hair piece, and even extensions to fill out my thinning hair. In the end (after adamant support from him), I opted to purchase an off-the-shelf human hair wig to be cut up and formed into 'patches' to be glued in place on my head. At the time, it sounded perfect - my natural hair wouldn't be covered, the patches would blend in and most of all, it could be maintained just like my own hair!

Despite my initial positivity, this 'low-maintenance' option was anything but. The human hair wig wasn't the perfect shade, and needed to be dyed, the patches of hairloss grew faster than the patches of hair could be made and don't talk to me about the glue which was oozy, slimy and took 3-4 hours to take off, clean and reapply. I was devastated. Far from feeling my glamourous, normal self, I was left feeling bereft and helpless, and this was incredibly higher maintenance than my own hair had been. I was gutted, but at the time, couldn't blame his advice, so decided to return for 'solution' number two. This time, the hairloss was too bad, so a 'cover' was the only option - it was a lace-fronted synthetic wig, into which clips were sewn for added security. It was hot, bulky, changed the shape of my head, itched like hell and generally made me feel even less comfortable and at that stage I entered my 'social recluse' phase, avoiding situations with people I didn't know and operating a 'zero camera' policy wherever possible.

This was one of my lowest points and it was directly linked to my wig. The unnatural appearance of my locks, coupled with the discomfort of the wig, not to mention the 'tugging' sensation on my scalp from the clips and I was pretty much at rock bottom. From here, I didn't know where to go and I wasn't sure there was a solution for me! Still, when it reached the stage where there was barely enough hair for the clips to cling on to, I returned again, this time looking for a more permanent solution - a human hair one preferably.

This time, a custom-made, hand-produced, European Remy hair wig was proposed and I went with it - finally, hair that would look just like mine, on a cap that fitted my head so perfectly it would be like a second skin. What's more, the cap would feature a silicone strip which would not only grip my head naturally, but which would enable tape or glue to be applied for added security - I was in my element! The only thing left to do was wait eight little weeks for it to arrive and I'd be happy!

Sixteen weeks later, the wig still hadn't arrived - there was no sign of it and the factory 'couldn't trace it'. I was devastated. My synthetic wig was loose, uncomfortable and in very bad repair and my confidence was at rock-bottom! When it finally arrived, the worst possible thing happened - it was wrong! The cap was far to big - in fact I could put it on my head with my hand up inside and even worse, it was 8, not 18 inches! I was gutted and refused to pay for it, and that's when I realised, no matter how well-intentioned the individual, it's very little use when they're not qualified.

Despite a pretty poor start to my wig journey, I did eventually find someone who was qualified and well informed in all things wig. They also talked me through each different type and then combined with a lot of my own research, I finally felt in control of my own destiny. As a result, I now have a small addiction (14 wigs and counting) and have a full range of synthetic and human hair ones that give me a lot of variety and choice! The best thing of all? Even though every one of mine is an 'off-the-shelf' one, they fit like a glove and still look incredibly natural - nothing like my very first ones!

For me, what I have learned from this experience is not to give up in pursuit of what you want. If a wig is the right way for you to go, then be honest and don't give up in finding and gaining what you want. What's more, if you are opting to visit a wig shop and not to buy them online, then check out the reviews and ask how they are qualified! It just might save you a whole heap of heartbreak!

Victoria x