These perceptions are influenced and changed by a number of factors, from our environment to our experiences, to our culture and our parents. In fact, so strongly can our own perceptions be influenced by others, we'll adopt them despite no first-hand experience; this makes considering another point of view totally alien. To give you an example, when doing my degree, we did a small amount of Anthropology, which is the study of humans and their behaviours in societies; one example which really illustrates the point I am making and has stuck with me since then is when you considered the eating habits of Romany Gypsies. According to a research study, the average white, middle-class person would never consider eating without a knife and fork, and except in socially accepted scenarios (like eating a burger), will never opt to use their hands / fingers to consume food. In fact, the majority will consider the germs on their hands and rule eating with their hands as dirty. Turn instead to the historic Romany Gypsy, and they consumed all of their food using their hands and fingers! Sounds madness, but in their culture, eating implements are considered dirty as it is unclear where they have been, whereas their hands are considered preferable as they can be assured of their cleanliness. Now, when you look at it this way, their logic is sound, meaning neither option is wrong, simply different.
I promise there is a point to this rambling, but these thoughts were prompted when cruising through one of the Facebook communities. I came across a post from a gorgeous lady called Summer from Oregan, USA. She posted "my daughter just turned three, two weeks ago and has really started noticing that others are different from me. I always thought I would end up having the "why does Mommy not have hair like everyone else" talk, however it has turned into, "why do others have hair". I never realised how normal it was to her for me to be bald, as I lost all of my hair to AU when she was a year old. She has never asked me why I am different, but wants to know why others are different. This really made me grin, I never realised before just how perfect we are to our children."
You know that saying "Out of the mouths of babes" which assures us that children can be bluntly and brutally honest? Yep! At times, it can be harsh, like the moment I was asked why I had massive red dots on my face (massive acne break-out), but it also has a fabulous side - that moment when they say something which stops you in your tracks and which you know must be true and heartfelt because they don't say things any other way? That statement from Summer's daughter is just that!
For me, what this prompted me to think about most is that whilst we each judge ourselves by our own standards, we shouldn't automatically expect those same judgements from others. They will have their own thoughts and opinions (and not all of them will be nice), but I think there's a lesson in here for us all - let's challenge ourselves to look at things differently every once in a while and see if there's a way we can make everything more positive! After all, I expected everyone to stare, laugh and point at me the first time I went out without a wig, but it simply didn't happen! In fact, the worst I got was a sympathetic look, and there was nothing at all that could be classed as upsetting; in this case, it was totally my level of expectation and my own expectations and perceptions almost made me stick to hiding beneath a wig!
Victoria x
www.prettybald.co.uk Twitter: @PrettyBald
No comments:
Post a Comment